I remember

I remember my sister whispering lies to me on Sunday nights, about how my brother was adopted and then she would cuss just to make me cry.

I remember the sunburns I would get in the part of my hair from playing outside too long. My feet always looked the same ways after hours of no shoes and grass and bike rides -- dirty and independent. 

I remember the first time I had allergies, my eyes were swollen and for the first time I hated the earth. Too much Benadryl.

I remember my dusty yellow room window seat and how that was the only place I could sleep on Saturdays when I supposed to be cleaning.

I remember the first time I started to care. My cursive wasn't pretty, I started to speak less, and people started to mention my smarts more than I wanted. I was the fastest girl in the class until one monday when I was slow and awkward and I didn't play soccer at recess anymore. I sat on the swings with the other girls and threw wood chips at the cute boys. And then I stopped singing out loud-- even in front of myself. I started taking naps and I started writing love notes because he started it. I remember the day I prank called him and then he cried when I told him I didn't like him anymore. His mom didn't like me after that.

I remember when she stopped calling me best friend.

I remember when he told me that I could choose to be happy then he taught me how to do the things that I loved more. He gave me books and cards and pep talks. I remember when we learned how to make pottery and then painted together all day long.

I remember laughing so hard we thought the raspberry and cookies-n-cream jelly beans would come out our nose. I remember the night we threw paper airplanes on your roof in the rain. I remember when we had an advice-column and your dog avoided me. We signed our names under the shelf in your closet before you moved. I remember our pill-bug races. We used to dance in your mom's bathroom and yell at your neighbors from her window. I remember the time we promised to still be friends when we are 80.